Category Archives: Doorway 10: Career, Ambition & Reputation

Day 35: What Are You Responsible For?

Responsibility is a sign of maturity. It’s one of the markers of being a grown up. It’s ownership for the things that matter to you, the things that are in your care. It’s ensuring that you’re the one that has those things turn out. It does not apply to everything or everyone. It is a very focused nexus of power.

Responsibility is literally your ability to respond. Your ability to respond becomes stronger and more multi-faceted as you grow up and into the roles you take on. When you are younger, there are parents, teachers or other authority figures telling you what you are responsible for doing. As an adult, you have to figure these things out for yourself.

Children are sometimes given responsibility for things they are neither ready nor able to take on. Some kids are more mature and willing to assume adult roles before it is appropriate or healthy. If you were one of those kids, you may have carried that feeling of responsibility into adulthood, and feel responsible for others who are old enough to be responsible for themselves.

Adela’s Insights

I was a very serious kid. My family emigrated from Cuba when I was almost two years old and it was clear to me early on that we lived by different rules. Both of my parents worked and we had chores and responsibilities. I remember that at first my only chore was sweeping and cleaning the table.

In our family everyone had responsibilities, everyone contributed. Laziness was not tolerated. My parents were very strict and big on discipline. There were serious consequences for slacking off on your responsibilities. No one did.

When I was 14 I got a job at the corner pharmacy. I remember my parents praise. They acknowledged my sense of responsibility and hard work.  I had given up singing in choir because it conflicted with my work schedule. Responsibility was highly valued in my family. Kudos were rare in my family. Excellence was expected. I remember feeling so proud.

I’ve always been uber responsible. As someone used to taking charge, and being responsible, it’s been a particularly difficult challenge. I’ve had to learn to loosen up and let go of things that are not mine to do. Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.

Jodi’s Insights

I was one of those kids who was eager to help, and was given quite a bit of responsibility at a young age. One of the things I was held responsible for was watching my brothers, so they didn’t get into trouble. There were three of them and only one of me. Although it was an impossible task, I felt responsible for them, long after childhood.

As an adult, I defaulted to feeling responsible for other people and their emotions. As an empath, I usually knew when someone was upset, and felt it was up to me to figure out how to fix their problems and make them feel better. If someone was unhappy or struggling, even if I had very little relationship to them, I felt responsible for cheering them up.

One of my long-time mentors was a Buddhist. She taught me that you can only be responsible for what you can control. So, since I had no control over anyone’s behavior but my own, it made no sense to assume responsibility for other people.

Knowing this helped me to have healthier relationships with everyone from my mother to my clients. It also allowed me to create appropriate relationship boundaries with others. This is something I had struggled with, but once I understood what my responsibility really was, it became a natural thing to do. And it did wonders for my relationships.

The Goddess of Now

The Goddess of Now says, that which you choose to be responsible for, beyond your own needs, shapes and structures your life in important ways. Those kinds of responsibilities allow you to develop your character and invest in something that gives you a sense of satisfaction. You may choose to take on a garden, a project, or a role in a volunteer organization.

The Goddess reminds you that the things you have the ability to respond to utilize your gifts and talents, allow you to be in community with others of like mind, and generally energize your life. Appropriate responsibility, taken on consciously, and with a sense of adventure and purpose, is positively life-enhancing.

Creative Exploration: Responsibility

Before you dive into today’s topic take a moment to feel your connection to yourself, to one another and to All That Is. Feel responsibility as if it were a crown. Notice what your crown looks like. Is it gold and jewel-encrusted? Is it simple and unassuming? Imagine that the things you are responsible for are symbols on your crown. Notice what you are essentially responsible for. Allow it to be what it is. Notice how it feels when you place it on your head. Is it heavy? Is it light? Does it feel just right (just like Goldilocks’ porridge and bed)?

Through the Goddess lens of Commitment and Self Love, consider your relationship to responsibility. See if there is anything you would like to shift or upgrade.

Pick from the writing prompts below, or create your own.

     I am responsible…

     Responsibility means…

     My responsibilities…

Write for 2 minutes (or more, if you like).

Day 34: Honor Your Passion, Shift Your Career

The old standard of a life-long career no longer holds true for many people. Today, folks not only change jobs frequently they shift career paths completely. I’ve seen this a lot in the coaching and consulting fields. I’ve trained with lawyers, doctors, teachers, etc.

Career is not the same as a job you do, primarily for the money. Career is something you do for a period of years, that you trained for and that allows for a progression. The Free Dictionary defines career as:

  1. A chosen pursuit; a profession or occupation.
  2. The general course or progression of one’s working life or one’s professional achievements: an officer with a distinguished career; a teacher in the midst of a long career.

It used to be that people had one long career in their life. Now, with the rate of change the whole world is undergoing, it’s common for people to have two or even three careers, as certain fields change and require fewer employees.

Adela’s Insights on Career

When I was in high school I remember the career planning received by my guidance counselor: pick a profession that guarantees a good income. I remember being filled with idealistic aspirations of making a difference and engaging in meaningful work and being quickly shot down.

I’ve always been a dreamer, but for a few decades I towed the traditional line, mostly because I had children very young. As a single parent, I needed to provide for my children and that took precedence for quite some time.

I’ve always had technical ability plus people skills. I actually like people, always have, always will. There is also a deep chord of service in me. I enjoy helping others. This translated in the business world very well. Through chutzpah, serendipity and persistence, I wound up managing technology for a New York City law firm without a degree or technical training. I got the technical training but I was most valued for my ability to get things done.

Later I left the law firm and opened up a 20,000 sq ft World Gym Fitness Center with my brother. It was an amazing 13 years of hard work and adventures in health and fitness. I loved it! I got certified as a personal trainer and fitness instructor and went on to study holistic nutrition, which forked off into another career as a life coach.

For the past 14 years, I’ve run my own online business, focused on evolutionary coaching and online business consulting. I’ve hosted over 20 events: expert interviews and telesummits, 30-day events and trainings on building online community and joint venture partnerships. In all of these, my passion for communication and collaboration have been the foundation.

Jodi’s Insights on Career

I had a 24-year career as a hair stylist and really loved it for most of that time. My second career, as an intuitive consultant, began nights and weekends, in 1997, while I was still doing hair. I had been studying and developing my own understandings and intuitive abilities for 15 years before I began working professionally. I did readings, taught meditation and intuitive development, later I added monthly Circles to my offerings.

For the past few years, my work has undergone many changes. I now do my sessions on the phone or on Skype, instead of in an office, but my work has continued to develop in fascinating ways in the 20 years since I started doing it as a career.

And then there’s my hoop dance teaching. That one’s a passion… I’ve done that for 7 years, now.

The Goddess of Now

The Goddess of Now says, your career is a wonderful way to use your talents and abilities to not only support yourself financially but to grow and learn about yourself. Ideally, your chosen career holds excitement for you and you find the work rewarding.

The Goddess says the real rewards, when it comes to career, are the people it allows you to meet, and the ways you develop through dedication to that career for many years. Whether you consider your career successful has less to do with financial rewards than benefits gained, in terms of how it challenged you and shaped your character.

[thrive_custom_box title=”Energy Shift” style=”light” type=”color” color=”#7100e2″ border=”#1e73be”]Before you dive into today’s writing take a moment to explore the thread of your passion – the one that drives your work in the world, your gifts. Feel the seedling that was planted within you before you incarnated. This seed has unique colors, textures, and tastes. It is unlike anything you’ve seen before. It is a wonder, a marvel, a once in a lifetime creation. Notice how your specific life path has nurtured and given rise to this blossoming beauty. It is you and your contribution to the world. Huzzah![/thrive_custom_box]

Creative Exploration: Writing Prompts

Through the Goddess lens of Commitment and Satisfaction, consider your relationship to career. See if there is anything you would like to shift or upgrade.

Pick from the following writing prompts, or create your own.

Career for me . . .

The career of my dreams . . .

My career . . .

Write for 2 minutes or more.

Day 33: Reputation

Vocabulary.com says, ‘Your reputation is the general belief or opinion that other people have about you. If you are considered trustworthy and kind, you have a good reputation.’

In an ideal world, your reputation is an honest assessment of who you are. Learning what other people have said about you can be enlightening. Or it can be devastating. Not everyone is going to understand who you are or why you make the choices you do. At best, you can do your best, and know for yourself who you are, and what you are all about. The more clear you are on your own value as a person, the more easily you can navigate the world. Other people’s opinions of you can be good feedback that lets you know you are missing the mark or not being clear in some way.

Reputation is really about the judgments and expectation of others who have seen or heard of you but may not really know you at aoo. So, maybe the question is, what do you want people to say about you? Do you want a reputation for being gutsy? Do you want a reputation for being confident? Do you want a reputation for being helpful? Do you want a reputation for being fun? Do you want a reputation for being spontaneous?

If you purposely start leading with the things you want people to notice and appreciate about you, you might have more to say about your (good) reputation than you would otherwise imagine possible!

Adela’s Insights

Your reputation is not really within the realm of your control. It’s based on the perception of others, which makes it tricky. You can do great work in the world and still there will be people that put you down. I’ve noticed this with colleagues who’ve gotten tremendous visibility (and it’s happened in my own online events and telesummits), people will say negative things about you when it is nowhere near your actual intention and delivery.

This is more a reflection of the person, than your own ability or performance. These folks are in the minority but it can be hurtful and knock you off your center until you’re really solid on your work in the world.

By far most of the feedback I’ve had on my events has been extraordinary. That lets me know that the effort and work that I put into my events is spot on and well received. One of the greatest pleasures in meeting someone new is when they tell me they’ve heard nothing but great things about me.

When it comes to your reputation keep your eye on the prize – your own work.  It’s the only thing you can truly control or shape. Let the accolades come when they may, and don’t focus on the negative nellies. They’re probably not the folks you’re here to serve.

The Goddess of Now

The Goddess of Now says, if you allow yourself to be controlled by the fear of what anyone else says or does, you have forgotten whose life you are living. If you think of your reputation as an image that others who don’t really know you, have pieced together, it’s easier to put it in perspective. The important thing is to live your life in such a way that what others say has no effect on you.

The Goddess says when you live from the heart, in the Now, decisions about how to live your life become much more clear. About that time, you may find you’ve gained a reputation for always being in the right place at the right time; or being so lucky; or having great instincts; or having a lucky star!

[thrive_custom_box title=”Energy Shift” style=”light” type=”color” color=”#7100e2″ border=”#1e73be”]Before you dive into today’s writing take a moment to experience yourself through the eyes of others. Feel yourself standing in the center of a circle, surrounded by those that know you. These are folks that have worked with you and have a good sense of your gifts and talents and their application. It includes bosses, mentors, colleagues, teachers, guides. Take a moment to see yourself through the eyes and hearts of each one. Notice what they say about you. Take it in and let it seep into your being until it is woven into the fabric of what you know of yourself.[/thrive_custom_box]

Creative Exploration: Writing Prompts

Through the Goddess lens of Generosity and Compassion, consider your relationship to reputation. See if there is anything you would like to shift or upgrade.

Pick from the following writing prompts, or create your own.

I have a reputation . . .

People always say I’m . . . 

My reputation . . .

Write for 2 minutes or more.

 

Doorway 10: Career, Ambition & Reputation

In Doorway 10, the natural position of the astrological sign of Capricorn and its planetary ruler, Saturn, we see our standing, in the world. Here’s where we see evidence of what we have made of our professional lives, what others know about us, and where we meet the world. This is the realm of career, reputation, responsibility, public image, ambition, and authority.

Doorway 10 and Doorway 4, its opposite, are the doorways that represent your parents. Traditionally, Doorway 4 shows the relationship to the mother or nurturing parent, and Doorway 10 shows the relationship to the father or structuring parent.

The themes of Doorway 10 can richly reward your life, but those rewards typically come as a result of hard work, over many years. This is where you discover your work in the world. Not just a job, but a career that you do over many years or decades, that allows you to develop your character and abilities, and grow into your potential so you can realize your aspirations and share your talents with the world.

Quotes

Quotes are a great way to explore your beliefs, thoughts, and impressions. They can expand your perspective and clarify your inklings. Here are some quotes on career, ambition, and reputation to support you in considering what aspects are ready for an upgrade. You can also use these quotes to do free flow writing and see what arises.

The unpredictability of the future means absolutely nothing to the dreams of an ambitious positive mind.  Edmond Mbiaka

Begin somewhere. You cannot build a reputation on what you intend to do. Liz Smith

Your reputation is in the hands of others. That’s what the reputation is. You can’t control that. The only thing you can control is your character. Wayne W. Dyer

Questions to Explore

Take a moment to sit with the following questions. You may want to journal on them or have a discussion with a close friend. You can also just sit with the question for a bit and allow your thoughts to arise of their own accord. Sometimes asking a powerful question is enough to create a shift.

  • How has your career shaped your sense of self?
  • How has ambition served you?
  • What responsibility will you happily take on next?

Resources

10 Ways To Successfully Build Your Online Reputation (Forbes)